Greetings from North India where just this week the ‘Project Help Team’ have been incredibly busy. The diversity of stories in this blog demonstrates what an extreme place Kotdwara is. We are delighted to share our progress with you, and we thank you from the bottom of our heart, for your kindness and generosity. So much is happening, and we are mindful that we could not impact the lives of people without your support …so thank you for connecting with our story. We are so humbled that ‘Project Help’ has grown in just a few years to be positioned in the midst of people’s celebrations, achievements, happiness, as well as their sadness and distress. This community is reaching out to us for help, we are touching people’s lives and we are making a difference.
Asha
Last week we reached out to you, to help Asha. Thank you to the people who were able to make a donation. We are thrilled to tell you that Asha has returned home from hospital. She is steadily recovering. There is still a long road ahead for her but ‘Project help India’ is checking in on her and the family daily.
Independence Day
This week each of our centres celebrated India’s Independence Day. We are teaching our students to work hard and to have a positive vision for their future. Through education and the changing of mindsets of those who live in poverty we are instilling a growth mindset in the way children understand their talents, abilities and value, and to believe for a hopeful and happy life. Together we work to build strong communities and a strong India. Our efforts this week were acknowledged in the local newspaper.
A significant achievement in Village Parmawala
Our teacher and community leader in Village Parmawala, Mr Sanjay Singh has had a remarkable impact in the lives of some of the local youth. Through counselling and mentoring, the young men of the village have committed to not drinking alcohol. Through empowering these men, they are also educating others, and have been working with the local police to make the entire village ‘alcohol free’. One of the goals of ‘Project Help India’ is to impact communities and bring about generational change. This achievement reflects the power of education and the building of trusted relationships. This is all incredibly exciting.
Introducing Anisha and Naveen
Aneesha is 10 years old and she really has a tough life. Rakhi her teacher at Parmawala brought this young girl and her sister Naveen (aged 8) to our attention. Becuase of poverty, these girls are at risk of significant harm due to the impact of alcohol and domestic violence. We are helping these girls through their access to a ‘Project Help’ education, however we are aware that there is not enough money in the family to provide for their very basic needs.  We would be delighted if anyone would like to reach out to sponsor this family at a cost of $25AUS a month. Contact us to let us know.
A Horrific Crime in Kotdwara
This week we were informed of a most distressing crime that occurred in Kotdwara.
“In the most barbaric incident of recent times, a serious crime of rape took place on 5 August 2019 in slum of Kotdwar. The police got the breakthrough when a family from Lakdipadao slum launched a missing complaint of their 10 yr old girl. According to police the girl was allegedly brutally murdered by two of her neighbours , Padam (28 yrs) and Ashok (31 yrs ). The two accused have been arrested. When the police interrogated on of the men he confessed to his crime. The body was found in a horrible state the cause of death was rape and suffocation. The body was in a decomposed condition as it was all eaten by pigs and stray dogs. This proves that the child faced the brutality. The incident had sparked a lot of outrage and left people shaken. They have become concerned about their children. Rape is the fourth most common crime against women in India. According to National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB ) 2013 annual report, 24,923 rape cases were reported across India in 2012 Out of these, 24,470 were commited by someone known to the viktim. 98% of cases. (Quoted from Project Help Officer’s email 15th August)
The victim of this most heinous of crimes, was not a student of our slum schools but her family lives in the same location. Our team has reached out to the family with gifts and emotional support. We pray that our love will provide some comfort in this terrible time. This incident has reminded us of the need to review our Child Protection programs in each of our schools, to give children strategies and awareness to protect themselves.
Our story is your story
​These exciting initiatives have only been made possible because of the generosity and prayerful support of others. Can you believe that all of this has happened in just one week?
YOU CAN BE PART OF OUR STORY
1. Donate - Your tax deductible donation can be made HereEnsure that you are donating to (WYG-IND-PHI-2019)
OR  if tax deductibility is not required, your EFT donation can be made at
BSB: 062 230 (Commonwealth Bank Randwick) 
Account: 1134 1909
Account Name: Project Help India
Please write your name in the reference section so we can thank you.
2. Share our Story - Please like and share this blog on Facebook, Twitter and other social media.Thanks so much.
Love Doug

An update about some friends I love in India. Thanks for taking the time to read this. Can you help?

The mission of ‘Project help India’ is simple – we help and care for people who live in extreme poverty. It is almost impossible to empathise and put ourselves in the shoes of those who suffer in this way. There is such a divide between us with all of our first-world comforts, and those who battle the challenges of having almost nothing each and every day. So many of their problems could be solved and difficult situations changed, simply with the equivalent of what we would spend on a daily cup of coffee. Poverty breeds poverty. It is an ugly, vicious cycle.

Yet we do make a difference.

Asha lives with her husband Sher Singh, and their 4 children in the Kotdwara slums. She is a kind and generous woman who has opened her home and shared her limited resources to support ‘Project Help’. Over the years, despite having nothing herself, Asha has made it possible for us to care for the many people, especially children, who live in her neighbourhood. Asha and Sher are saints. Despite the hardships they endure, they make sacrifices for others. Just a few years ago, they even suggested that ‘Project Help’ might build a public toilet block that would have taken up the entirety of their tiny courtyard, a metre from their back door. We didn’t go ahead with this because it would have compromised their health and safety.

Asha and Sher truly live out the Bible verse that commands us to love our neighbours.

Now it is our turn to help Asha. Just two weeks ago, we received the news that only just a few weeks after her home was destroyed by the monsoon, she had a massive heart attack. Hearing this news, ‘Project Help’ was able to jump into action and immediately transfer some funds to India. This saved her life because she was transferred to a hospital in Bijnor where she received specialist medical help. Additionally, last week, we were incredibly grateful to some of our amazing Australian supporters who this week donated $1000 which was needed to provide the ongoing help that Asha needs.

Amit, our Project Director sent me this report this week:
This is Asha. She is one of our Cooking staff in Slums Center and she also lives in slums. This week she had a heart stroke and immediately we the Project Help sent her to a specialist heart hospital. Her treatment is going on from later 5 days and doctors said that her on of the heart valve is blocked and they did the angioplasty. But unfortunately the cost of this treatment is very high price @80,000 approximately with hospital charges, medicine, etc.
The family of Asha is very very poor. They earn every day 200 Indian rupee ($4AUS) that means 6,000 rupee ($120AUS) per month. In Asha’s family there are 6 members all together with children. Last month this family went through a big problem too. As because of the heavy rain their wooden and plastic sheet roof fell down and they lost their everything like clothes, mattresses,  bed, tv, fan, eatable things etc. In this case Project Help helped them with money as most of you our friends from Australia send help to us.
Now these days once again Asha and whole family going through with big difficulty as they are helpless to pay this big amount. They are looking forward for a generous help. We have to pay for Asha within a week so I kindly urge for your generous help .
May God Bless every one of you.

Asha remains in a critical condition and she continues to fight for her life. Might you be able to make a donation? You can have confidence knowing that your kindness and generosity will make a difference. You may never meet Asha and her family but these wonderful people are connected to you through the story that we share together through ‘Project Help’. They send their love and gratitude.  

YOU CAN BE PART OF OUR STORY
1. Donate - Your tax deductible donation can be made HereEnsure that you are donating to (WYG-IND-PHI-2019)
OR  if tax deductibility is not required, your EFT donation can be made at
BSB: 062 230 (Commonwealth Bank Randwick) 
Account: 1134 1909
Account Name: Project Help India
Please write ‘Asha’ and your name in the reference section so we can thank you.

2. Share our Story - Please like and share this blog on Facebook, Twitter and other social media.

Thanks so much. Love Doug.

It was only during the first week of the school holidays that my son asked me to attend with him, the funeral of one of his surfing mates. The young man who passed was only nineteen years old and sadly he took his own life. It was a difficult funeral to attend, and the church was ‘packed’ with teenagers and young adults. My son has now had to come to terms with the suicide of 3 young men, friends and acquaintances, who he has known through his connections in the Maroubra surfing community. In the midst of the overwhelming grief there was a desperate atmosphere of trying to make sense of this. This is an alarming statistic that reflects the impact of what health professionals are calling a mental health ‘epidemic’ in our nation. When I was last in India, I read a news article that addressed similar statistics in schools and universities in Mumbai. The incidence of suicide related to students not coping with the pressure of their academic performance across Asia, for example in Singapore, is recognised as a national well-being priority.  The need for each other to talk, have conversations, and to check-in with one-another is clear. I see that strong schools, with excellent well-being programs are key in helping children and teenagers navigate the stresses and challenges of life. I am thankful for the foundations of a Claremont College education that prioritises the well-being, resilience and flourishing of the children.

And this Tuesday I attended what was perhaps the most heartbreaking funeral I have ever attended. Whilst it’s a relief that this was not related to anyone from our school community, none-the-less, the circumstances are about as harrowing as one could possibly imagine. A little boy from my church, Josiah, died on the day of his first birthday. Josiah was accidentally killed by his father, who was reversing the family car. I attended the funeral to support not just the family, but also to be there for a number of my very close friends including my pastor, who all have the enormous task of caring for Josiah’s mother and father, over the days and years ahead. Whilst it was tinged with hope and faith, this funeral was just so, so sad. Words can not express and so many questions just cannot be answered. The tears flowed the moment we all walked into the church.

I share this news because I know that the mother and father, and wider family, desperately need prayer. There was also a powerful sentiment conveyed through the eulogies that has really impacted me, and has drawn me to write about this. The message was simple…

Life is fragile and we must never let the fusses and small stresses of life cloud what is most important to us all… our family and friends. We must keep perspective and never live with regret. We must reconcile with loved ones. Fights and unresolved conflict are not worth it. We must never be too busy to enjoy time spent with family, and we must always tell our each other how much we love them. In my busyness, I must confess that I am guilty of not always getting this right. I get busy and upset about stuff that really is not important. Josiah’s mother and father spoke courageously at the funeral. The raw emotion was heartbreaking to watch and experience. The mother feared that she “would not be able to get up off the floor” the day after the funeral. Please pray for them all.

So with this, I pray that we would all take the time this weekend to enjoy the blessings before us. Enjoy the crisp winter morning, enjoy the sun, connect with family who you don’t see enough, enjoy the company of your children and loved ones. Tell them that you love them more than ever before.

As a community, we must be committed to walking alongside those who are grieving for the long haul. When the funeral is over and all the people have gone home, that's when the painful and difficult journey commences. 

Thanks Warren Wong instagram.com/wflwong for the image

Sowing my passion into education and making a difference in my school and in the world...

​Life in India is full of extremes, and just this month in July we have seen the harsh impact of this. Only a few weeks ago, the temperature in Kotdwara was over fifty degrees. Since then, we have been deluged with the extreme rain from the seasonal monsoon. Each day we come face to face with the impact of extreme poverty. Sickness and death is a reality of life and whilst it’s easy to get ‘used’ to this, our mission and projects focus on combating poverty. We will not settle for accepting this, knowing that our efforts can have significant impact in the lives of children, families and communities.

Check out July-in-pictures to see just how much has been achieved. It's amazing! Just in this month of July, the work of ‘Project Help India’ continues with purpose and momentum as we provide opportunities for;

- improving children’s health and nutrition
- education and learning
- social work and counselling
- emergency crisis care
- creating community and a sense of belonging
- environmental responsibility
- community impact through drug awareness
- individual lives changed
- a brighter tomorrow and hope for the future
- experiencing God’s love

Thank you to all of our supporters. It is simply because of your generosity that all of this is possible. We also thank our teams in Kotdwara and Bijnor for their tireless work. ‘Project Help India’ has 14 paid staff. We honour their innovation, problem solving, determination, sacrificial efforts, care and compassion.  What you have achieved in just these past 4 weeks is truly remarkable. You inspire me!

Love Doug :-)

YOU CAN BE PART OF OUR STORY
1. Donate - Your tax deductible donation can be made at Here.

Scroll to bottom of page and ensure that you are donating to (WYG-IND-PHI-2019)

OR  if tax deductibility is not required, your EFT donation can be made at
BSB: 062 230 (Commonwealth Bank Randwick) 

Account: 1134 1909
Account Name: Project Help India
Please write your name in the reference section so we can thank you.

2. Share this Story - Please like and share our latest blog on Facebook, Twitter and other social media. BLOG - Extreme-living-extreme-action-July-in-pictures

Thank you - it was a community effort

Our "Well-being Challenge' on the last day of Term was a significant event for our school community. We received a mention in the 'Daily Telegraph' with Claremont also receiving a special shout-out from Ben Fulham on Radio 2GB, praising the kids for their 10000 burpees, and our fund-raising efforts of approximately $28000. Our local members of Parliament Matt Thistlethwaite (Federal MP) and Marjorie O'Neill (State MP) joined us. We thank them for their support and encouragement, especially by coming along to our event at Grant Reserve.

Through this challenge we have demonstrated the power of us coming together for such an important cause, the Prince of Wales Hospital - our local hospital that helps our older teens, our parents, grandparents… all of us really. This was more than this however, as we have demonstrated that our wellbeing is a community responsibility. We have also demonstrated how remarkable our school community is. Go Claremont College!

Thank you children, thank you teachers and staff and thank you parents. We have shown that we are here for each other, and especially for our kids. I started this year reminding us of that fabulous verse that says;

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13).
​
​I believe that our community and the society we live in really does need more love. We live in a time where so many people seem to be angry, criticising, blaming and having a go at each other… we must not forget the power of love and shining the light on all that is good in this world and in each other. Our Wellbeing Challenge has been such a fantastic experience, a highlight for me as Principal.

As for my other personal challenge...I continue to push myself at the gym 5 mornings a week. I have reached 7000 burpees and 7000 push-ups (give or take a few). 

The ‘Claremont Health, Fitness and Well-being Challenge’
We are excited to launch the ‘Claremont Health, Fitness and Well-Being Challenge’ which will culminate in a celebration event on the last day of Term 2 at Grant Reserve on Friday 28th June. As a school we will be raising money for the new ICU Ward at our local Prince of Wales Hospital. Our fundraising target is $10 000 and we ask all parents and your extended families, work colleagues and friends to get behind such an important and worthwhile cause. Our theme is ‘Locals Helping Locals’. All of us certainly benefit from living in close proximity to our local hospital and we want to support and encourage the amazing people at the Prince of Wales who work so tirelessly for our community. This is our opportunity to get behind you and help fund the new hospital which will certainly be a blessing to our local neighbourhood (and beyond) for generations to come.
 
Ten thousand burpees and push-ups! Perhaps a world record?
Did you know that the world record for the most burpees is 7295 in 12 hours!
 
As part of the fund-raising campaign, I have set myself the personal challenge to complete 10 000 burpees and 10 000 push-ups (but not all in one go). I started the challenge back in February and I am just a little over the halfway mark. While I have not set myself a completion date, and I am certainly not going to break any world records, I am hoping to finish on the 28th June at our Celebration Event. My body is already full of lots of aches and pains from doing this, so I am not going to do anything stupid.
 
On our Celebration Day, we are going to break our own Claremont record, by all doing ten thousand burpees at once. 400 teachers and children will each do 25 burpees at once, totalling 10 000, and we think we can break this record in just a few minutes. We hope that many parents will also join us for what will be lots of fun. We are also hoping that the media will be present as well, so that we can share the message of Claremont’s involvement in the local community.
 
My personal connection
Many of you know that this year my family was impacted by the tragic death of my son’s girlfriend, Marli in January. Marli had just graduated Year 12 at Brigidine College and she had the world before her. Marli died of a drug overdose at a party. She had never taken drugs before and she paid the highest price for a very unforgiving mistake.
 
It has certainly been a challenging journey for my son as he makes sense of this loss and comes to terms with his grief. He is definitely not ‘over’ this, but he is making good progress. Gulliver has channelled his energy into his passion by surfing 1000 waves, and he too is raising money for the Prince of Wales Hospital, through his cause ‘1000 Reasons for Marli’. I am so proud of his determination and courage in what has been such a difficult time for him. You might have seen the article in the ‘Daily Telegraph’ on Friday 31st May.
 
Individual well-being goal setting
The tragic loss of Marli, has certainly evoked a lot of soul searching and contemplation about how we make sense of loss and deal with grief. My faith has certainly been a source of strength and comfort.  As a father it has been very difficult to watch my son grapple with his emotions and come to terms with all of this. Gulliver’s surfing challenge has given him a purpose that has helped him to channel his energies and grief into doing something positive, especially so that Marli’s death was not in vain. We all take comfort in this verse:
 
“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28.
 
As an educator, I have thought deeply and hard about how we prepare children for the challenges of life. Drug education, even in the early years of a child’s education is certainly necessary. I strongly believe that this is a community issue with schools, parents, police and other health professionals collaborating and working to solve problems together. The conversations we have with our children about difficult issues and concepts must be had starting in the early primary years, and not just left until the teen years when they are directly facing the challenges. I also believe strongly that we must be equipping and empowering our children to talk to each other, and to have the skills to support their peers, to be role models and ‘upstanders’ willing to intervene and help others (as opposed to being ‘bystanders’ who watch, keep silent and do nothing).
 
Therefore, as we embark on our Wellbeing Challenge, we have aligned this initiative and our fundraising with our Peer Support Program. Lead capably by our Year 6 and Year 5 students, all children (K-6) are currently participating in four Peer Support sessions that focus on;
 
fitness
healthy eating
mindfulness - gratitude and appreciation
kindness and generosity.
 
Across our Peer Support Program all children will talk about setting an individual goal based on one of the four themes. Their peers will then support, encourage and inspire one-another as they work to achieve these goals. We encourage you to talk to your child over the coming days about what might be their goal (realistic and achievable). This is where our fundraising efforts will connect with individual goals, by asking your friends and family to sponsor them and to encourage them to achieve their well-being goal.
 
Four weeks until the end of Term 2
With four weeks until the end of the term, the ‘Claremont Health, Fitness and Well-being Challenge’ will also be incorporated into the children’s PE, Sport and Health lessons. We will also link key messages into our Chapel teaching theme for Term 2 which is all about being ‘Inspired for Life’.
 
Thanks for reading, and getting on board with these exciting and important initiatives and ideas. Please consider if your business can make a tax-deductible donation, offer prizes or should you have any creative ideas for how you can get involved, please do not hesitate to contact the school.

Tomorrow (Thursday 18th April) my wife and kids, and 10 other Australians are heading to Kotdwara to present and be a part of our SHINE19 Women's Empowerment Conference. We are super excited and full of anticipation for the many lives we will impact. Our bags are all but packed totalling about 350kg of luggage ... including 1000 toothbrushes, 1000 fans, 900 mirrors and lipsticks for our 800+ delegates, 350 packets coloured pencils, textas and tennis balls for the 260 children in our centres, teaching resources for our new Disability class, gifts for teachers and many others, not to mention just a small amount of space for our clothes and personal items. 

Please pray for us, for our safety, good health and that our hard work and efforts would encourage and make a long lasting difference in the lives of many people.

​My family, 8 other Aussies and a South African will be heading to Kotdwara in North India in just three weeks time, for ‘Project Help India’s second women's SHINE19 conference. This conference is an important aspect of the 'Project Help India' vision, and we can't quite believe that another year has come around. Compared to last year, the number of delegates has doubled, spanning two days and receiving registrations from close to 900 women.

Most of our delegates are women who live in slums, in terrible poverty. These women can't afford to pay, so we are not charging them. We want to bless them and give them an experience they will never forget. Teenage girls from local high schools will also be attending as well as women who are community leaders, because our aim is to empower all women in all spheres of life.
After SHINE18, our conference this year has become the talk of Northern India, with local media doing press releases, billboard advertising, and even politicians and Bollywood celebrities wanting to both attend and be seen supporting and advocating for this important cause.
Because of SHINE19 we are positive and confident that women's lives will be changed and empowered.

Through this we will see…
stronger lives, stronger families, stronger communities and a stronger India.

‘Project help India’ is pioneering this cause in this remote part of the world, so please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

If you could make a tax deductible donation to support our work, we would really appreciate this. And please spread the word if you might know people who might be passionate about human rights, human justice, anti-human trafficking, and who might be stirred to make a donation to this worthwhile cause (we need some help as the cost all adds up and is now close to $6000).

How you can help
1. Please share this blog to people you know whose business or company might like to support this wonderful cause…it’s tax deductible for them too.

2. Please make a donation. 
Go to http://projecthelpindia.co/donate to make your tax-deductible donation in Australia
OR if tax deductibility is not required, your EFT donation can be made at
BSB: 062 230 (Commonwealth Bank Randwick) 
Account: 1134 1909
Account Name: Project Help India

Please write your name and SHINE19 in the reference section so we can thank you.

With love and thanks for your support and interest.

We were shocked and saddened by last Friday’s tragedy in New Zealand. The loss of innocent lives is deeply confronting. Our thoughts and prayers are extended to those immediately impacted and their communities, particularly in schools across Christchurch. Due to the many educators who visit Claremont College, we have formed many close friendships with a number of schools in New Zealand, and so we have reached out to them offering our love, prayers and support.

Schools provide a safe and supportive environment for all students, staff and their community, and so our primary goal this week has been to review and consider our response to this tragedy. Each week, on a Monday morning, our Pastoral Care team meets to review the pastoral and wellbeing needs of students, staff and families. We evaluate issues from the week before and we plan how to best care for children and others across the week ahead. As a team we considered how we respond to the Christchurch tragedy and discussed what would be the best way to talk to the children. Our actions included:

• To talk at an age appropriate level, to the children in class, should questions be asked or comments be made;
• To ensure that the children’s experience at school be safe and secure;
• To provide an opportunity for prayers and reflection at Chapel; and
• To celebrate ‘Harmony Day’ which was held yesterday across Australia. Thank you Mrs Cameron (Deputy Principal) for leading this.  

Harmony Day provided us with the opportunity to talk about the importance of inclusiveness, respect and belonging for all Australians. We celebrate the diversity of our many cultural and religious backgrounds, and understand the importance as to why, we as Australians, should work hard to create a nation that is characterised by peaceful, harmonious relationships. The timing for this conversation could not have been more appropriate, and serves as such valuable reminder not just for the children but for all of us adults too.

GRANDPARENTS AND SPECIAL FRIENDS DAY
This week we were blessed to have so many Grandparents and special friends visit us. It was fun and very special. Congratulations to the children and teachers for your presentations. There was certainly a lot of love in the air!

HAPPY GREEK INDEPENDENCE DAY
This weekend we celebrate Greek Independence Day. I look forward to being with many of our Greek families at Martin Place on Sunday.
​
NATIONAL FUTURE SCHOOLS EXPO AND CONVENTION
I have spent three days this week in Melbourne attending the ‘National Future Schools Expo and Convention’ which was attended by approximately three thousand delegates. It is always such an honour and privilege to talk about Claremont College. Yesterday I was a member of panel of Principals where we were asked to speak about ‘Strategies for School Leaders to Realise Learning Improvement’. I was also a keynote speaker at the ‘Future Leaders’ Strand where I presented on the topic ‘Planning for the future – change, strategic planning, and a leadership toolkit for disruption, and your personal wellbeing’. If you are interested, the slides of my talk have been uploaded to the school website. Click here to follow the link.

One of the things I love about conferences such as this, is the chance to hear cutting edge talks on a variety of topics that interest and are important to me. Some of the presentations I attended included the new Digital Technologies Curriculum, Positive Psychology in the school setting, researched based strategies for students with autism, latest research findings in brain based learning in children, future innovation and emotional resilience. All up, it was a productive time and I look forward to sharing my ideas and all I have learnt with the staff, and with you all.

As I gave my talk yesterday, I concluded by saying that we need to “keep things simple” and to not lose the perspective of the things that are most important to us all. Our communities must be places where people come first. For me, this means that we must prioritise hope, purpose, reconciliation, unity, diversity, empathy, compassion and most importantly… love.

Let’s continue to hold up Christchurch in our prayers. My heart also breaks for Mozambique, Malawi and Zimbabwe as millions of people come to terms with the destruction of Cyclone Idai. Our world is certainly hurting. Even if it’s a ‘drop in the bucket’, and we are all positioned to make a difference.
Thank you for all you bring to our school community… It wouldn't be the same without you.

I am grateful for the opportunities that bring us together as a community, for it is in community, working together as a School and parent body, with our conversations together, our shared purpose, consultation and collaboration, that we find the solutions to best care for your children. For this reason, at a recent parent function, I shared my perspective on some heavy stuff, as a concerned and very grateful Principal, and also from my perspective, as a dad who has seen my three teenagers navigate and try to make sense of the world they are growing up in.

If you did not attend the event, I shared an experience of my childhood. My mother would often describe me (and probably still does) as “a little bugga” and I fully understand why. I sometimes did things that I am sure mystified her. Like the time in Grade 2, for no reason at all, I ran up to a girl at school and whacked her hard on the bottom. Our scary Deputy Principal at the time (who every child feared), summoned me to his office and proceeded to hit me on the hand with his thick black rubber pipe, which he affectionately called his "licorice stick”. I recall that moment clearly and I remember my mother saying that afternoon “well you must have deserved it!”. My mother asked no further questions and she directed no accountability for my punishment towards the Deputy or School. Times have certainly changed with some parents in this day and age, challenging schools, without placing any responsibility on their child for his or her actions (or on their own parenting). “My child would never be a do that!” one might say, and if a consequence is put in place, the school is unfairly criticised.

As we work together in a spirit of trust and respect, there is a healthy middle-ground.

With children growing up in a new world filled with new issues and concepts to those we experienced as children, and a very different to the world our mothers and fathers, we must work closely together. Take a child’s easy access to pornography for example. How necessary is it for both parents and the school to work together to help our children navigate this ugly territory? It both saddens and maddens me that psychologists and schools must now deal with a disorder termed ‘pre-adolescent porn addiction’. The majority of children aged 10, will have looked at explicit porn. My experience when working with these children who feel that they have done the wrong thing, is that they clam up and don’t say anything to their teacher or mum or dad. If it’s a group of children who have done the wrong thing there may be a code of silence, or they all point the finger of blame in different directions. It is easy for kids to live with the guilt and shame of their actions, often without telling a soul, way into adulthood. We must carefully balance the issues of debriefing, resolution, consequence, learning from mistakes, and knowing what is appropriate for the future. If we don’t do this well together, a child or young person’s mental health is certainly at risk.

How do we do this? The School and parents must work together in partnership. We certainly don’t blame or attack, should a child make a mistake. If we just ‘punish’ then our children will never come to us for help. As children get older, the challenges they will face will only become more difficult and complex. With children’s forms of social media thrown into the mix, it’s a foreign language for all of us adults. 
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It takes a community to support a child and it takes a community to support mum and dad. It takes great mums and dads to support a school. We are in this together, and on behalf of my entire staff team who work so tirelessly for your children, I offer you my sincere thanks, for working together with us to support your children. 

Thanks @timmarshall for the fantastic image.